COOKIES
by dyslexic-Carmie
Summary: Oneshot. A girl delivers Girl Scout cookies to the Soviet nations.


The little girl was shaking as badly as the hand of an old person trying to pour a glass of juice. She was standing on the doorstep of the biggest house she had ever seen. The house was so big the little girl pictured a bowling alley and rollercoaster inside of it.

The little girl's imaginative thoughts, on the size of the house, were cut off by her impatient mother's voice. "Jodi, ring the door bell or get in the mini van!"

The little girl mumbled something, as she stood on her tiptoes to reach the doorbell.

_Ding Dong _

The little girl began shaking more as she saw a big shadow come to the other side of he door. She wanted to run back to the mini van and be with mommy, but she also wanted to sell more boxes then little curly-haired Cindy. And win that bike.

When the door opened the little girl quickly began her advertising speech. "Hello, my name is Jodi and I'm a member of troop 135. My troop is selling cookies to pay for our trip to-"

"Slow down, I have no idea what you're saying," said a very tall man wearing a white scarf.

"Oh...Ummm." The girl began shaking even more nervously.

"You're kinda cute da. You remind me of Latvia." The little girl had no idea who this Latvia was.

"Hello. My name is Jodi and I'm a member of troop 135. My troop is selling cookies to pay for our trip to camp. Would you like to buy some?" The little girl managed to give her speech in a much slower voice this time, and as she gave her speech, she held up her cookie order form in front of her face.

"Ah, cookies. I like cookies," said the man as he took the order form.

"Would you like to pay now or when the cookies come in?" The little girl was so nervous she asked this question before the man ordered any of the cookies.

"I'll pay when the cookies come in." The man said as he put checks in the boxes for the types of cookies he wanted.

"Ok," Said the little girl still shaking like the upper arms of a grandmother when she wins Bingo.

"Here you go." The man handed the little girl back her order form.

The girl was amazed on how many boxes the man ordered when she looked at her order form. "That's a lot of boxes," she said before she could stop herself.

"Oh, they're not all for me. I ordered my family all their favorite cookies." The little girl didn't care if the man was just justifying his cookie craving or if he really was ordering cookies for a big family, she was just so happy. With this many cookie orders, she would surely beat Cindy.

"Did the man buy any cookies?" Her mother asked when she returned to the mini van.

"Yes, mommy, he bought a lot," The girl said as she handed her mother the order form.

"My Goodness, Jodi, this man brought a ton of cookies!"

"I know, Mommy. I'm so totally going to win that bike!"

"Did you thank the man?"

The little girl then remembered that she did not thank the man for buying all those cookies. She knew she couldn't lie to her mother so she weakly said, "I forgot."

"Jodi Louise Longstocking, you go back there and thank that man for buying all those cookies!"

The girl just wanted to go home, and call Cindy to brag, but she left the car to go thank the man just like her mother wanted. Once she got to the doorstep of the big house she ringed the doorbell again.

_Ding Dong_

This time, a pretty woman with an unpleasant look on her face answered the door. The look on her face scared the little girl, causes her to shake all over again.

"Can I help you?" The lady's voice sounded like a mix between evil and desperation.

"Oh…Ummm.."

"Look kid. I don't have all day."

The little girl was so nervous she forgot why she came to this door ended up reciting her cookie sale speech. "Hello my name is Jodi and I'm a member of troop 135. My troop is selling cookies to pay for our trip to camp. Would you like to buy some?"

"Depends, are you selling those chocolate fudge brownie squares?"

"Yes, ma'am," said the girl as she handed the lady her cookie order form.

"Ok. Two boxes of chocolate fudge brownie squares for me. I'll order Russia some of his favorite. And I might as well get Ukraine her favorite. Oh, look, you have those oatmeal cookies Estonia likes, might as well get those too. And, while I'm at it, I might as well order cookies for Latvia and Lithuania," The lady mumbled as she filled out the order form.

"Would you like to pay now or when the cookies come in?" The girl asked when the lady returned the order form.

"I'll pay when the cookies come in."

"Thank you," the girl said as she walked back to the mini van. She was so going to get that bike, and little curly-haired Cindy was so going to eat her heart out.

On the way to the mini van, the little girl came across a short boy trying to climb a tree.

"Hey, can you give me a boast?" The short boy asked.

The little girl was so nervous she ended up reciting her cookie speech again. "Hello my name is Jodi and I'm a member of troop 135. My troop is selling cookies to pay for our trip to camp. Would you like to buy some?"

"Sure, I'll buy your cookies as long as you give me a boast. Sealand got the kite stuck in a tree."

The little girl handed the short boy the order form. "Ok, I'll buy the ginger cookies. And I might as well get Russia his favorite. Belarus would be mad if I didn't get her chocolate fudge brownie squares. And while I'm at it I might as well get some for the other Baltics. Oh, and I shouldn't leave out Ukraine," mumbled the short boy as he filled out the order form.

"Would you like to pay now or when the cookies come in?" The little girl asked when the order form was returned.

"I guess I'll pay now," said the short boy as he put his hands to his pocket. "Crap, my wallet is inside."

"Oh."

"I'll be right back. I'm going inside to go get my wallet." The short boy started walking away towards the big house.

While the little girl was waiting for the short boy to come back, a woman with a large chest crossed her path.

"Are you lost, sweetie?" Asked the women with the larger then normal chest.

The little girl was so nervous again she recited her cookie speech again. "Hello, my name is Jodi and I'm a member of troop 135. My troop is selling cookies to pay for our trip to camp. Would you like to buy some?"

"Oh, you are so cute! Of course, I'll buy your cookies," said the big-breasted women as the girl handed her the order form.

"Ah, this is wonderful; you have all of my favorites and Russia's favorites. Oh, and you even have those weird fudge things Belarus likes. I might as well get all that and some cookies for the Baltics," the woman said as she filled out the order form.

"Would you like to pay now or when the cookies come in?" The little girl asked after she was handed back her order form.

"I prefer to pay when the cookies come in."

"Thank you," said the little girl as the large chested woman walked away.

While waiting for the short boy to return two men came by. One had straightened blonde hair and the other had brown hair.

"Liet, why did we, like, totally decide to go fishing? It's, like, soo boring," said the blonde one.

"You said-"

Unfortunately the brunette one was cut off by the annoying voice of the blonde one. "OMG, Liet! It's, like, totally a little kid! We should totally, like, take this kid and be, like, its parents and stuff!"

"I don't think that's a good idea. What's your name, little girl?"

"Hello, my name is Jodi and I'm a member of troop 135. My troop is selling cookies to pay for our trip to camp. Would you like to buy some?"

"Like, totally! Liet, buy all my favorite cookies from this cute little kid."

The little girl handed the brunette one the order form.

"Oh, those look yummy! And those look like yummy too!" The brunette one looked like he was having a hard time keeping track of all these cookie orders.

"I ordered some cookies for Belarus too. And I might as will treat Russia, Ukraine, Latvia, and Estonia."

"Yeah, order, like, whatever you want. You're paying for it all," said the blonde one as the brunette one handed the girl back the order form.

"Would you like to pay now or when the cookies come in?"

"I'll pay when the cookies come in if you don't mind."

"Thank you," said the little girl as the two men walked towards the big house.

Finally, the short boy came back with his wallet. "How much do I owe you?"

The little girl was so nervous she started reciting her cookie sales pitch again. "Hello my name is Jodie and I'm a member of troop 135. My troop is selling cookies to pay-"

"Yeah, I already ordered some. How much do I owe you?"

"Sixty-three dollars and eighteen cents." The short boy found it interesting that this little girl could shake more then him.

"Thank you," said the little girl as she accepted all the cash.

Once back in the mini van, the girl's mother asked her again if she remembered to say thank you this time.

"I said thank you." This wasn't exactly a lie she did tell all those other strange people thank you when they brought cookies. She just didn't find the man with the scarf to tell him thank you.

"Good job, Jodi. Now, lets go to Wal-Mart to get some hot dogs for dinner," said the mother as they drove away from the big house.

Two months later, the little girl was back again at the big house with a giant wagon to deliver all these cookies. She was still shaking as badly as a kitten being placed into water.

_Ding Dong_

"Hello, my name is Jodi and I'm member of troop135. I have with me all the cookies you ordered," said the little girl nervouslywhen the man with the scarf answered the door.

"I didn't order that many cookies," The man said looking at the big stack of cookies on the wagon.

"Uh, the other people of this house ordered cookies too."

"Follow me inside, please." The man said as he opened the door wide enough for the wagon to get through.

The little girl forgot the rule on stranger danger and followed the man inside to the living room. Sitting in the living room was the pretty evil looking lady, the short boy, the large chested woman, and the brunette. The little girl didn't see the blonde man with the valley girl voice, but, inside, she saw another man. This guy looked smart because he was wearing glasses and typing on a laptop.

"So, who ordered cookies from this Jodi? Did I get your name right?"

"Yes," said the little girl.

"I did," said everybody except the glasses wearing one.

"Well, don't just sit there, pay the Jodi," said the man with the scarf.

Everybody except the glasses wearing one and the one that already paid gave her cash stood up to pay her.

"Well, somebody get the boxes off the wagon, so that Jodi can be back on her way," said the scarf wearing one as the short one quickly started unloading the boxes.

"Bye, the Jodi," said the scarf wearing one as the little girl left.

The little girl was so happy. She kept pictured the look on Cindy's face as she ran to the mini van.

"Did you thank everybody for buying all those cookies?" Her mother asked when she took her seat in the mini van.

Without saying anything to her mother, the little girl ran back to house to tell them thank you.

_Ding Dong_"This time the large chested woman opened the door.

"Oh, sweetheart, right now is not a good time. Russia is spoon-feeding Latvia all the extra cookies we mistakenly ordered and Lithuania is-"

"Thank you!" Then the little girl ran back to the mini van.

**A/N**

**Well, this was long. I named Jodi after my cousin. **

**B.R.'s Note:**

**I want Girl Scout cookies now.**

**- Oxenstierna D. Yuki-Rin**


End file.
